Smo'dis looked up into the darkness. It's not like he needed to, by now he knew every inch of the Wargod's cavern. It was more out of respect.
"LAT BEN HUME FUR NUB EBUN ASH MUUN AGH LAT AM BAK HEER MURE TYMZ DEN MUUNS LAT BEN ALIBE!!!"
"Yub, me gruk," was Smo's answer.
"WHI AM LAT HEER NUW, SMO'DIS??"
"Bekuz me wuz clompd bi humie?" he answered.
"AGH WHI WUZ LAT CLOMPD BI HUMIE???"
"Erm. . . bekuz im wuz rydin fuud agh kud ged awai tu heeli faztur?"
"Bekuz im am kiggr agh kebd kigg krimpin me?"
"Bekuz im wuz warin sulid medul armur?"
The Wargod growled loudly. "LAT GRUK ID!!! ID AM DA SAYM TING EBRI TYM!!!"
Smo'dis looked at his lower paws and frowned. "Bekuz me am klumzi."
"DAT RITE! WEN LAT WUZ ATTAKIN DA HUMIE IN DA ROK-CLOMPIN CABE, LAT ALMUZD CLOMPD F'RU AGH GRIP'TA! BOFF UB DEM!!!"
Smo'dis growled softly. "Yub sur, surri sur."
"NUW WUD AM LAT GUIN TU DU ABOWD ID???"
Smo'dis was fed up with the routine. He'd get clomped, the Wargod would yell at him for being clumsy, and he would promise to not be so clumsy next time. It's not like he didn't try! It's not his fault, doesn't the Wargod understand that?
The Wargod could sense the anger in Smo'dis even before he blurted out, "Ib me kud kuntrul id me wud! Bud me kant helb it!!! ME KANT!!!" Smo'dis fell to his hands and knees and started shaking with tears of frustration and anger. All his orcish life he'd been cursed with clumsiness. He didn't know how to explain it. He thought he could overcome it, but he couldn't. He was a disgrace - to himself, to his adopted family, to the clan, and to the Wargod.
Then, for the first time Smo'dis could remember, the Wargod spoke softly to him. "Der der, Smo, der am sumting me neeb tu blah tu lat," he said.
"W-wut dat?" Smo asked, looking up again.
"Smo. . . lat wuz burn klumzi. Lat hab a kundishun. . . a kundishun dat nub ebun da bezt surjins kan kur. Id am kalld 'die-lub' by humiez."
"Die-lub?" Smo repeated, letting the strange word roll over his tongue.
"Yub, die-lub. Die-lub iz akshulli wen sumash am burn wid a brokun biulujikul clok."
"Wud am ash biulujikul clok?" Smo asked.
"Id ledz latselb gruk wut tym id iz. Bud latz iz brokun. Sumtymz lat am struk wid die-lub, agh latz mynd gu intu da fuchur agh see tingz dat nub habbund, whyl latz budi ztai in da pazt agh stup until latz mynd kumz bak."
"Gah, dat sowndz cumplikaded."
"Yub, id iz. Humiez hab diffrunt naymz fur id. Sum kall id 'bounz-bak.' Uddurz kall id 'buumurang.' Agh id am dedli simptum ub die-lub."
"GAH! Wel, wut kan me du tu kur id?" Smo asked.
"Wel, Smo, der am nub kur. Me hupd dat lat kud ovurkum id. Lat am strung ork, agh stil yung, ebun doh lat am gruwn-ub. Bud it seemz dat nubash kan ovurkum die-lub."
"Su. . . me am guin tu be klumzi furebur?"
The Wargod replied, "Id am puzzibul, Smo. Bud me hab bin wachin lat, agh me tink me kan mayk ash kur. Me kall id Tash."
"Tash? Agh id maykz orkz nun-klumzi?"
"Yub, bud id am nub finishd yed. Me need ash rayr ingrediunt. Ebun ib me kud fynd id, me kan nub mayk enuff tu mayk da kur purmanunt."
"Gah. Bud id wud be worf id, ebun fur dat shurt tym, tu be abul tu muub lyk da rezt."
"Nub wurri abowd id, Smo. Lat juzd gu bak agh du latz ting. Ebriting wil wurk owd in da end, me garunti."
"Yub sur!" Smo saluted and waited to be sent back. As he vanished, the Wargod whispered, "Yub, Smo, lat nub wurri abowd id. . . Tash, har. . . "
As usual, Smo'dis couldn't clearly remember what happened with his conversation with the Wargod. All he remembered was waking up at the feet of a fort healer. But he felt a little bit better about everything as he scrambled to his feet and raced off to rejoin the battle.